"Men are, that they might have joy."

Today I sat and looked at myself in the mirror for a minute. I do this periodically. Normally I pull faces and am just silly. But today I was in a reflective mood so I reflected. I considered the fact that sometimes I feel like a plain Jane, and other times I feel beautiful. Looking at myself I felt beautiful. I then tried to straighten my face the way they did in old fashioned pictures (the way my hair is done today gave me the idea). Immediately I thought I didn't look as pretty. So I smiled. Ah! There was beautiful Cindy. And because I was in a reflective mood it made me think. People look more beautiful when they smile. But why?

What is it about a genuine smile that brings out the beauty in ourselves and others? I didn't change anything but my smile, but I felt a remarkable difference. My conclusion: We are creatures of joy. When we smile, we are true being true to ourselves--our true nature.

In the LDS religion, we believe that each person's soul is made from their body and their spirit--and that our spirits are literally spirit children of God. Each of us then has a spark of divinity within us, commonly referred to as the light of Christ. In English it is most commonly referred to as our "conscience"; the piece of us that knows good from bad, sometimes without even being taught.

As I considered on the belief that we have a spark of divinity within us and my conclusion about being creatures of joy, I decided that the two must be irrevocably connected.

First, believing we are spirit children of God, in order to understand our nature, we must understand God's. Many times God is portrayed as an angry being, and in the scriptures there are clear evidences of his anger (think of the many stories where He, or those He sends, destroys the wicked). We are even pretty good at seeing his mercy and love towards us. "God is love." (1 John 4:8) "For God so loved the world..." (St John 3:16). But what we often fail to miss--which seems odd to me-- Is God's joy.

Zephaniah 3:17 "He Lord thy God in the midst of thee is mighty; he will save, he will rejoice over thee with joy; he will rest in his love, he will joy over thee with singing." This scripture says God will rejoice over us, even with singing! Here we see his Joy.

When Jesus is talking to the Nephites (teaching them what he taught the Jews in Jerusalem) he says "And for this cause ye shall have fulness of joy; and ye shall sit down in the kingdom of my Father; yea, your joy shall be full, even as the Father hath given me fulness of joy; and ye shall be even as I am, and I am even as the Father; and the Father and I are one;" (3 Nephi 28:10). Jesus teaches that when we sit down in the Kingdom of Heaven, we will have a fullness of joy, as HE has a fullness of Joy--and HE is like the Father, God. If He is like God, then this scripture means God has a fullness of Joy. I could quote scripture after scripture to say the same thing. But I will let it stand there. God's nature is one of joy.

As I mentioned before, in the LDS church, we believe that the soul is SPIRIT and BODY. We are Spirit children of God, and therefore have a portion of his nature installed in us--our divine spark. If God is a Being of joy, then our spirits too are beings of joy. Going further, however, we can see our bodies are made for the purpose of finding joy. When God created Adam, He created him in His own image--after his likeness. We were created as humans--with fingers and toes, our brain, heart, stomach, liver, etc--in His image. Not much is known about how the brain really works. We're trying, but well, technology hasn't caught up. However, we know some things. We know that there are chemicals produced in the body that make us feel happy and receptors in our brain that allow us to feel joy. Once again, created in the image of God, our bodies were designed to have joy. Our souls, combined body and spirit, are creatures of Joy. And God wants us to be happy!

In the Book of Mormon it teaches "Adam fell that men might be; and men are, that they might have joy." (2 Nephi 2:25). God created man, and allowed for the fall so we could find joy. Why do we have to find it? Why don't we just have it if we are truly creatures of joy? The simple answer is we don't have God's full nature. We are mortals, and as mortals, we make mistakes that take us further from God and his path--further from our true natures and the source of our joy. We also have physical bodies that sometimes get in the way instead of helping us find joy. That's what this life is all about--the search for joy.

Depression and unhappiness or even discontent can be caused by doing things which are wrong. God, being a loving God, didn't give us the commandments to punish us. He gave them as a guiding system to the true path--the path that leads to joy and happiness. Scripture after scripture talks of being with Him in Heaven and having joy. Joy then comes from being one with God.

This isn't a concept that only Mormons or even Christians believe. In Taoism, Joy is the complete union between ourselves and the cosmos--the spirit in nature. Believing that the spirit in Nature is God, Joy is uniting oneself with God. Buddhism teaches that to reach Nirvana, you must rid yourself of all desires for evil or wickedness and that until you do--until you are empty of desires to do wrong, you cannot have the joy Nirvana brings.

This is why repentance is connected with Joy throughout the scriptures. Luke 15:10 says "Likewise, I say unto you, there is joy in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner that repenteth." Isaiah 35:10 "And the ransomed of the Lord (those who have repented and been forgiven) shall return, and come to Zion with songs and everlasting joy upon their heads: they shall obtain joy and gladness, and sorrow and sighing shall flee away." Again, there are countless scriptures, but these two sum it up. We are unhappy when we separate ourselves from God through sin and are happy when we repent and return to Him.

Unfortunately this doesn't sum up all the reasons it's hard to find joy. If wickedness or our attitude/alignment towards God was all it took to have joy, many people struggling with depression today would not be struggling. They would be happy. But they're not. I feel like I'm one example of this. I read my scriptures. I pray. I try to serve others and keep the commandments. I repent of my mistakes and I just keep trying. But I still struggle with chronic depression. The answer to that lies in our physical bodies.

When I was younger I didn't understand this--I assumed that I should be happy because I was doing what I needed to make my spirit happy. But I wasn't doing what I needed to make my body happy. I am one soul--a spirit and a body--so ignoring the body had some nasty side effects. I was seriously depressed and saw no hope. I felt God had abandoned me. I held on to the scriptures that promised joy, but I felt it was unattainable. I don't know exactly when I figured it out, but somewhere along the line I did. Maybe it was piece by piece, but I know it today. Simply put, in order to have true joy, both my spirit and my body need to be taken care of.

My body doesn't produce or receive the chemicals that make us happy correctly. It's not just me. It runs in the family. My mom struggled with it. Some of her siblings struggle(d) with it, some of my siblings struggle with it. I struggle with it. It's a daily fight. So I'm on medicine. The only moments of full joy I feel in my life are when my body is balanced by the medicine and I am on God's path--striving to unite myself to His will.

Not everyone dealing with depression needs medicine, but it's vital for us to consider our body as part of the equation. Whether it's getting more exercise, eating better, sleeping regularly, etc, we must make sure both our spirit AND our body are aligned, or else we never REALLY have joy.

Even with my physical, mortal body causing most of my depression, I find solace in the scriptures. Long term, the scriptures offer plenty of hope. After the judgement, those who are deserving will receive their reward. "And whoso is found a faithful, a just, and a wise steward shall enter into the joy of his Lord, and shall inherit eternal life." (D&C 51:19) Once again, plenty of scriptures to back this up. But even on the short end, there is still hope.

The atonement of Christ was not only so we could align ourselves to God by repenting, but so Christ could take upon Himself our pains and sorrows--allowing us to feel free and offering joy. Alma 7: 11-12 says "And he shall go forth, suffering pains and afflictions and temptations of every kind; and this that the word might be fulfilled which saith he will take upon him the pains and the sicknesses of his people...and he will take upon him their infirmities, that his bowels may be filled with mercy, according to the flesh, that he may know according to the flesh how to succor his people according to their infirmities." Christ has the answers to even my physical pains.

Of course, it's not so easy as simply asking God to take them away. Christ can help you carry your burdens, but some of our infirmities, such as depression, are given to teach us lessons, so God just doesn't take them away. But I find comfort in 2 Nephi 25:23 "for we know that it is by grace that we are saved, after all we can do." If I do all I can, Christ will take care of the rest.

Doing all I can requires me to stay on the path of God--to pray, to read scriptures, attend church, and keep all of the other commandments--and when I screw up, to repent. Doing all I can also requires me to take care of my body--eat well, sleep well, and take my medicine, go to a counselor when needed etc.--to allow it to feel joy. And if I do the best I can, God will always be there with a life saver.

Being a creature of joy can be hard work--at least if you want to remain a creature of joy, but as Nephi stated "Men are, that they might have joy". It's my job in life to find joy. It's easy to want to give up, but really, that's the depression talking, not our souls. Our souls want joy. They want to return to their natural state and be aligned with God.

There is no worthier or more fulfilling search than the search for joy.