Day 13...maybe. Beginnings.

I think it's technically day 12, but I'm not sure so I'm going to base it off the date from now on, even if I'm wrong.

Anyway, today has been a very eventful non-eventful day. It was supposed to be me sitting at school, coming home and studying, and attempting to fit everything else in between. Those things all happened, but that's not all that happened.

Today my not-so-baby nephew turned 16. For him, this is a new beginning: driving, dating, more church responsibility, and a sense of excitement about life. I'm a little jealous of the excitement that age offers and not at all jealous of the whole teenage part. I want that excitement without giving up all the great stuff I have now.

Of course I was either hypomanic or depressed the entire year I was 16, so I may be assuming his excitement is higher than it actually is, and should honestly stay away from it. Who knew there is a thing such as too much happy??

Thinking of my bipolar, today in grateful for the beginnings I have in my life. I am balanced, just the right amount of happy, and honestly content for the first time in my memory. With that I have a fresh start with the congregation at church--no past anything to hold me back, no fear that they remember that time when I was hypomanic or depressed and couldn't do something or did something weird. I also have a fresh start at school. I get to be balanced student Cindy. So far it's been great.

To top that off I found out I'm going to have 2 more nieces or nephews this year. Babies are the essence of beginnings.

It's easy to see these types of beginnings. They are obvious. I write them here and you all are able to understand. But there a lot more beginnings we miss.

There are students who I interact with and a beginning of potential friendship exists. There are people whose attitudes change and they have a beginning essentially as a different person. There are the moments when you decide to do something slightly different than you have before, another beginning. Each of these beginnings will either become solid or they will whither away.

My thought tonight and my challenge is to analyze the beginnings all around You. Decide which ones you want to water and which ones you want to whither.

Take this chance, right now, today, to choose to feed the beginnings that allow you to be happier, friendlier, and kinder. Begin to treat yourself better. Begin to allow yourself to dream and go far. Beginnings, if cared for, become life. Make your life the best it can be by beginning to make it so.